A close friend of mine was killed in a mysterious auto accident recently. I say mysterious because of the lack of any information about his death. We had reconciled after a terrible scene caused over, what else, but money. Monies he owed from a personal loan. I intentionally aired my grievances publicly to maximize the impact on him. I knew his biggest fear was upsetting his neighbors with any kind of drama. He had made a few people uncomfortable in his neighborhood and because of some prior bad behaviors was likely one complaint away from eviction.
He also was known around the local area as a teller of tall tales. Not serious things but rather silly claims of heroics he had performed. He told these things for reasons nobody understood. He gained nothing from it and all his stories were filled with contradicting statements that people knew upon hearing to be untrue. So, I waited for him to come home one beautiful Saturday afternoon. I knew he went to visit his mom on Saturday mornings and when he arrived back home I was lying in wait to confront him and I was determined to make a scene.
His neighbors across the street were also friends of mine and had invited me to their pool party scheduled that very afternoon. It was perfect for my intentions and I was ready. As he approached his front door, I sprang out of some bushes and right away I asked him where my money was and why had he robbed me. It all worked like a charm, or so I thought at the time. I was loud and had the attention of all the neighbors. I didn’t have to say too much before he realized what I was doing. He swore to pay me right away. He said he could get monies from his family to pay what was owed. Claimed it could be done within a couple of hours. I agreed to let him leave without any more outbursts from me but assured him I was not leaving before being paid and would stay behind, hovering about, ready to start up the public scene again if there was any delay in him getting it done.
He left his place and was back in an hour. He repaid the loan that same day and as he handed me the money, he told me that he was deeply hurt and humiliated by how I had confronted him. He said he had a very good reason for his not paying on time and that I would have understood had I been willing to listen to what he had to say. He then handed me an envelope. I noticed it contained money and something else. It looked like an iPhone case. I told him that it wasn’t my case. He said he wanted me to have the case so I would know that he valued true friendship more than anything else. I didn’t know what the hell he was talking about. I thought that at the very least he was being hyperbolic and as I said before, was known for telling wild stories that were complete fantasies. I’m being kind because what he was in reality was the worlds worst liar. Worst because of the frequency with which he spun these lies and worst because he was terrible at the lies that he told. Lies that no one with any reason would ever believe.
Because of his history of telling lies to literally everyone we shared even casual friendship with, I didn’t give him any chance at all to respond during the initial confrontation. I can still remember fantastical stories of undercover FBI agent careers and claims of his being a secret millionaire who was in hiding from the mob. Once he handed me the envelope, I left immediately. He tried to continue our friendship and stayed in touch but we never met to hang out with just the 2 of us and eventually he moved away at a time that I was out of town on business for a 4 month stretch. Upon arriving home is when I learned from a mutual friend of ours that he had been killed in an automobile accident. I was so distraught.
Not so much about his death but about what else I learned from our mutual friend. Steven had completely changed his life in every positive way one can change a life. He had gotten sober. This led him to the acting career he had a abandoned because of his chemical addictions and he had landed a role with a major network. This is the break that all pursuing an acting career dream of and work toward. Achieved by maybe one percent of the hundreds reaching for the rare break that at times propels one to a place of wealth and fame. The exclusive club of the famous few was within his reach when he was killed in the mystery accident. His past addiction I learned later, was amphetamines. I researched this type of addiction and learned it was likely the cause of the lies, the monies never paid and all the other characteristics he had been displaying for most of the time I had known him.
When Steven was first introduced to me I was immediately drawn to his personality. He was one of those people that is just so likable that you wanted to be in his orbit. He made everything seem so possible when you were with him. This is the time in our friendship when he asked for the loan. This is the person he had returned to being once he was in recovery and when I think of him it’s that person I remember and I miss.
A few weeks later, while organizing my junk drawers, I came across the envelope that had held money. Were it not for his passing, it would have gone unnoticed and thrown in the trash, but it was now memorabilia and I also remembered the iPhone case. It was still in the envelope. I had never paid any attention to it because it was gold in color and the very definition of ostentatious. If I’m being honest I viewed it as rather feminine and would have been crucified by my gym buddies had they seen it. I picked up the iPhone case by itself for the first time ever and upon doing so, noticed the peculiar weight of it. It was far heavier than I recalled but on the day it was handed to me, I was hyped up on adrenaline and for whatever reason, just didn’t notice.
Seeing the case and envelope brought on feelings of remorse. I wanted to use the case for myself now that it had sentimental value to me but wasn’t sure it would fit my iPhone. I took out my phone to see if they would be compatible. I couldn’t believe how heavy it was. I thought it was steel perhaps. Upon further examination I saw it was engraved with a name I couldn’t make out and had also been etched with a series of numbers I recognized to be the kind you see on limited edition collectibles. I couldn’t make out the numbers other than to recognize that they were numbers of some denomination and the name engraved on the case had multiple possibilities for names that it could possibly be.
Using just the description, I searched for cases that matched my cases description. The very first thing listed in my search was the tag line “Most expensive iPhone Cases In The World.” I’m sure you can guess where I’m going with this story but for posterity’s sake allow me to introduce you to the Miansai, 14ct gold iPhone. Google it and you will learn that it’s constructed of 14ct solid gold and sells for a minimum of ten grand and can go as high as 15 grand. I was in disbelief. What I was looking at on the screen of my iPad looked identical to what I was holding in my hand. As I sat there making comparisons of photo to object, I remembered the words Steven had said to me, as if they had only just been spoken moments earlier. I felt my old friends presence there in the room. I have since confirmed that my case was indeed constructed from 14 karat solid gold.
I have no idea if my friend knew the value of this case when he gifted it to me that day. I suppose I will never know. It’s so weird for him to have put it in the envelope to begin with. But what I do know for sure is that the experience was transformational for me and that my way of thinking about other people has evolved. I’ve learned that the opportunity for small acts of kindness is presented throughout the day and it takes almost no effort to be kind to others. I want my core beliefs to be more aligned with the Steven that I was so impressed and infatuated with when we met. Wherever he is now, and for the record I don’t have an opinion on what happens when we die, except to say that I swear I felt him in the room that day, but with adrenaline, who knows, but wherever he is I hope that he knows that his message was eventually received and that in the end, he changed someone’s view of the world in a profound way and in doing so changed the lives of others around me, who I hope to be the friend to that he was to me on that day when a raving debt collector arrived and accosted him in his front yard, in front of his neighbors.
No idea if my story will have any meaning to anyone besides me or if there is even a lesson to be learned here. I don’t know.
What do you think?
Jacob Ryan
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