For the ‘umpteenth’ time I joined my favourite weight-loss club. This time, though, I proved to be a success – I got to goal weight, went on the maintenance plan and attained the cherished Lifetime Member distinction. Then I was encouraged to work for the organisation: first as receptionist and later in the ego-inflating position of lecturer. I loved the attention, the power, the inside scoop on diet and nutrition, and I really wanted to help ‘those people’ lose weight.
I had it made. I would be thin for life! But wait, a strange thing started to happen to me. I gained weight – just a pound at my first monthly weigh-in, then two pounds and finally four. I was above my goal and was ordered to get it off. I had the humiliating experience of being
weighed weekly by the receptionist on duty. I’d heard about Overeaters Anonymous (OA) from a friend and thought it might be the ‘magic’ I needed to lose the weight. I didn’t dare tell my employer that I could not ‘diet’ anymore, so I went to one OA meeting per week. I talked only about my stress of being ‘over goal,’ and never mentioned that I binged for two days following my weight-loss class and then starved for two days, even occasionally purging with laxatives. I couldn’t lose the four pounds, I couldn’t bear the guilt of what I was doing yet I couldn’t stop doing it. I didn’t want to give up my position of lecturer. Finally some OA members helped me see the light, and I resigned. The pressure was off. I had it made once more! I
would come to OA once a week, and life would be grand. I didn’t understand the program, I didn’t work the steps or use the tools, and that December I left OA. In six months I gained 50 pounds. Humiliated, I was isolating so I wouldn’t see any of my fellow members – from OA or the weight-loss group. I was at the lowest point of my life; I wanted help but could not ask. In pain, I finally reached out to an OA speaker I’d heard at a meeting the previous year. I thank God that she convinced me to go to the meeting that same morning. I finally felt I belonged there, and I desperately wanted OA.
I felt relief and peace at that first meeting. I got abstinent by attending four or five meetings per week, even traveling great distances to reach OA. I listened, read, shared, telephoned, gave service and got a sponsor who had what I wanted. I still do these things and the promises are coming true for me. Today I am free of the obsessions with food, weight, scale and dress size. I now accept myself as I am. I’ll keep coming back; for today I truly have it made!
OVEREATERS ANONYMOUS ®, INC.
From: Lifeline April 1995
Copyright 2019 by Overeaters Anonymous, Inc.
Reprinted by permission of Overeaters Anonymous, Inc.
To learn more about Overeaters Anonymous, including finding a face-to face or virtual meeting, visit oa.org